Concessions

[Negotiation = Compromises + Concessions >-> Agreement/Peace/Mutual-Benefit]

.:.Maybe vacillation is an o9a trait? The Old Guards told me long, long, ago, way back in 2010ish that they were going to leave cyberspace… and they are still around 12 years later. And… I’m still here. Unfortunately, I have emotions. My emotions are what makes me come back and forth to ONA. One emotion is “long-time” sentimental attachment, like how you get sentimentally attached to a certain heirloom your late grandmother may have given to you… or like how as children we were sentimentally attached to teddy bears and dolls… or like how  you grow attached to an old pair of faded jeans with holes in them but you can’t throw them out because you’ve had those jeans for so long, despite the functional fact that such holely [holy? holey? Idk how spell it ((the adjective of “hole”))] don’t function properly in a practical way. ONA is like an old pair of my favorite jeans with holes in them which I can’t seem to throw away.

It would have been easier for me to throw these old jeans away and sever my sentimental ties with ONA, if things were left the way they were, and no new writings or blogs presented themselves. Unfortunately, after clicking on links at theo9away.wordpress.com site, I stumbled upon a new o9a archive, addressed as [gawathan.wordpress.com]. My emotions changed after I read the PDFs on that gawatham blog, one of those PDF’s is an interview of Anton Long dated 2021 called “An Aristocratic Ethos.” The other PDF that influenced my emotions was one called the “Boundaries of O9A Philosophy.”

It’s hard to explain my emotions I feel after reading those PDFs. The emotions are a mix of Sympathy and Guilt. I will explain both feelings one at a time.

By the emotion of Sympathy, what I mean is that I like “Anton Long,” or the person behind that penname. As a human being, I have a certain aspect of my personality and characteristic where I just like helping people out with whatever they are doing, like projects, brainstorming, homework, research, whatever; even if they don’t directly/specifically ask me for help. If they don’t stop me, I will just keep trying to help them. And that aspect of my personality comes from my Brain’s need for stimuli. I just simply love to solve problems and mysteries. It’s the underlying reason why I spend so much time doing Natural Philosophy and studying Nature: because its a huge Mystery that can be solved.

And so its because of that dharma I have for wanting to stimulate my brain by solving problems and mysteries that gives me the emotion of Sympathy for Anton Long. He seems to be wanting to do something or go somewhere with the ONA. I get that impression because: why on earth would a human being from England, on this earth, which is in the middle of nowhere special in the universe, spending so much of his mortal time on such an earth [50 years and counting] putting in the time and effort to make ONA and write ONA shit? It must mean something to him? He must be going somewhere with it? There are so many things a elderly human being can spend their mortal time on earth doing, like find a ladyfriend, travel the world, garden, but Anton Long seems to have a thing for this ONA thing? What’s he trying to do, I wonder? Whatever he’s trying to do: I can help in my own ways by looking for problems and malfunctions, and figuring out how to work out those bugs… “debug” ONA as the computer jocks would say [there are bugs in ONA memeplex: unless you are suggesting to me that Anton Long is – like the Pope – perfect and infallible]. My Sympathy for Anton Long is rooted in Curiosity: I’m just curious what he is doing, when he dedicates 40-50 years of his human life manifesting ONA.

And so, in that curiosity, over the years, I mis-interpreted what Anton Long was trying to do. In the past, during the early years [2007-2009], I thought Anton Long was trying to make ONA into a satanic cult. And so, what I did was write a bunch of stuff about ONA that pulled all of the Satanic stuff to the foreground and pushed all of the other stuff to the background. But Anton Long wasn’t making a satanic cult. And so, I later thought that maybe – given his early years – that Anton Long was trying to make a Nazi cult. I can help with that too. I’m not White or a Nazi… but who cares, I can swing way Far Right rhetorically and talk Hitler shit. But I learned that he wasn’t trying to make a Nazi cult either. Maybe he’s trying to make a philosophical thing? Like his own school/denomination of philosophy? I can help with that too. And so I talk a lot about Buddhism and Natural Philosophy.

And so, that’s what I mean by my emotion of Sympathy for Anton Long. I don’t mean that a pity him.

What I mean by my emotions of Guilt… there are many reasons why I feel guilty. I make mistakes in/with ONA since 2006/2007. I failed many times in my attempts and endeavors to do certain things. For the past year, I have been thinking: ‘If me and all those ONA people [Old Guards and so on] did not (1) talk Anton Long into retiring & (2) did not make it open source… would everything that happened since 2018 ever happened?’

I feel Guilty, because I said that ONA was liberal in neutering and getting rid of Anton Long. The truth is, because of my helpful nature, I had a lot to do with that. The reasoning – back then, as I shared with the Old Guards – that I believed that Anton Long should retire, was that ONA needs to be weened from an ideological source and that ONA should not be become a personality cult. Because if ONA remains dependent on Anton Long to keep feeding them/us “official/authoritative” manuscripts, and if ONA becomes an Anton Long worshiping personality cult and the person behind Anton Long passes away of old age [as we all do in Time], then: ONA will die with him. If you go back and re-read the poem I wrote called Caladrius, which I wrote way back in 2009, before Anton Long retired: you can see where my mind was and that even back then, I saw a problem with Anton Long being the head of ONA. In that Caladrius poem, I said: “So dependent on your nightingale that you become sick and lost without her.” And so, in order to heal the King: you have to remove the King’s dependence on that nightingale.

But, when ONA became leaderless and open source, new problems arose: people randomly, from time to time, began to claim to be the new leader or the new outer rep of ONA; and entryism took place. The most significant entryism in ONA’s recent history would be agents acting thru telegram and the ToB manipulating people. I feel Guilty because I was, and still am a huge proponent of a leaderless and open source ONA. Back in 2013, in my resignation paper I turned into the Old Guards, I specifically wrote, defying growing sentiments in ONA at that time, that the only ONA I recognize is one that is leaderless.

Was this a big mistake I had made? I feel very bad inside, because all those years, I was only trying to help Anton Long grow ONA, and I helped cause big problems.

That feeling of Guilt from making mistakes in the past, gives birth to another Guilt I feel: I feel Guilty for leaving/abandoning a big mess I helped make, and not trying to clean up after myself. It’s like me saying: “So yeah… ONA seems to be fucked up… I don’t like it no more… see ya! You guys can fix it!”

And so in my feelings of Guilt, I came back to try to fix problems I see, which I helped make: the problem of ONA needing ethical boundaries, or needing to get rid of that document “authority of individual judgment.” [*]

Which is when I called a Truce to have an open discussion.

COMPROMISES & CONCESSIONS

I’m familiar with negotiations. Mostly from my many years as a tagger, and working the political side of tagger crews with our shot callers. Rival crews “battle” each other for things like territory, their members, spray cans, weed. After the battle/war, we hold Negotiations. A “negotiation” just means when two rival crews/nations sit down to make Compromises and Concessions, in order that BOTH sides benefit somehow. That’s the Honorable way to do things as the winner of a war: you are considerate of your rival’s needs and wellbeing. It’s dishonorable as the winner to just take everything: it makes you look bad to everybody, and exposes your ignoble character.

For example, this one time, our crew had won a battle with a rival crew. The stipulation of the battle was that the losing crew gives up their best tagger to the winning crew. We won, and so we initially demanded that the losing crew give up their best tagger, per stipulations. The losing crew said: “Come on… he’s our best dude. If we lose him, then how are we going to win battles with other crews?” And so, our crew made a Compromise, we said: “Okay… you keep him. But you give us your spray cans, and Green River street as part of our turf, and if our crew gets into a battle your crew helps us and vise versa. Deal?” The rival crew agreed, and so they made the Concession of: giving us all their spray cans and one of their streets they controlled and promising to help us in future battles.”

And so Compromise just means that you understand that you cannot always have things your way, that you must give up certain demands, that you must meet the other party half way. And Concession means to understand that you need to give the other party things. The honorable end goal is: mutual benefit, which is the desired end result where peace and harmony can arise.

And so, those two concepts [Compromises and Concessions] came to my mind when I read the several PDF’s at the Gawatham O9A Archive blog. It fix problems in ONA, Anton Long and the Old Guards made Concessions, where they brought all the boring stuff of ethos and ethics to the foreground of ONA… made such concept of ethics relevant again. They also, via those PDFs, made it known that ONA is not socially liberal because ONA is still about its Traditions.

Because of those Concessions, which I really like, I feel Guilty for abandoning ONA [the spirit/egregore of ONA], and am happily willing to make Compromises: I understand that ONA can’t and shouldn’t give me all of my demands, just to make me happy. I’m only one person of many ONA associates. I am not an individualist [re: individualism]: my own single person’s contentment is small and subordinate to that of the Collective/Whole Organism [the living entity that is ONA, of which we are cells]. The spirit of ONA was willing, via its OG cells, to meet me in the middle, and I will oblige by meeting the spirit of ONA half way, in that middle ground, and will – if I may – continue to help it in my own ways, as I have been doing.

Neither swinging to the Left or the Right. Neither extremism or extreme intellectualism. Buddhistically: sukkha [peace] is the Natural state of equilibrium where the Pendulum comes to rest. Ultimately, ONA must learn to neither swing in either direction, but to find its center: its natural state of peace and equilibrium. As a memeplex and social order [subculture, school of philosophy], ONA is still young, and has a lot of time to make mistakes, errors, and eventually find its Sukkha.

The various PDFs at Gawatham O9A Archive honestly makes me proud to be associated with ONA. I am hoping that new, future generations of ONA initiates/associates read and study those documents: because every thing that ONA writes [our words] are like fishnets that are cast out [as Christ taught]. And those fishnets bring in fish such fishnets are Designed to catch. Because Realistically [re: Realism] when we say “ONA” or “Order of Nine Angles” we are talking about a reific entity which is an abstract noun that isn’t real [can’t be pointed at or touched]. In Reality [re: Realism] what exists are people who are influenced by or identify with ONA. To catch Honorable fish: you need fishnets that are imbued with concepts of honorable behaviour and aristocratic/noble ethos. Those things need to be brought into the foreground, and what elements of ONA that got us into this mess [since 2018] need to be pushed to the back of the stage.

A few snap shots from Gawatham’s PDF stash:

source: https://gawathan.files.wordpress.com/2022/10/o9a-interview-2021a.pdf

source: https://gawathan.files.wordpress.com/2022/09/o9a-boundaries-philosophy-v9.pdf

source: https://gawathan.files.wordpress.com/2022/09/o9a-boundaries-philosophy-v9.pdf

The Truce was fruitful. Now we can all return to status quo.

[*] My personal opinions/views about this document [the authority of individual judgment] – and this is purely my own fallible opinion – is that the said document was not written by Anton Long in the first place, and so, it is not primary source, and thus, is not even binding. But, at the same time, and in contrast to my individual opinion, a subculture and culture and Tribe has Elders, and such elders [especially in my strict Asian culture] and their elderly views [wise and experienced] are to be honored/respected by those younger [in age or in wisdom or in experience] than they. Our English word “Senator” does come from a certain Latin word with a topical meaning. And so, regarding that text of authority of individual judgment, my personal position is that: it is not primary text, not binding, or defining, but out of respect/honor [one who has the capacity to Honor/Respect/Venerate], being an Elder in this ONA subculture, the author’s text should be held in significant cultural/subcultural regard and thus adhered to.

/Thank You.

Authority Of Individual Judgment

.:.The snapshot is taken from the ONA MS “Authority of Individual Judgment.” There are 3 [three] points about that axiom which all ONA associates should understand and remember:

1. There is no such thing as an “official” or “genuine” ONA. No official interpretation of ONA which is the only correct and acceptable Order of Nine Angles.
2. You first must be an ONA Adept [able to answer 10 esoteric questions] and be a member of the Inner O9A before you have the proper wisdom and experience [via Pathei-Mathos] to make an interpretation of ONA.
3. There are no leaders or outer representative of the Order of Nine Angles.

That ONA MS Is Here

Was The O9A ‘Outer Representative’ Role A Jape

A Swing Of The Pendulum

.:.A response to the Fenrir Team and a general thinking out loud to the general ONA audience:

I personally like Nameless Therein a lot. In more ways than you think. He is a “sight for soar eyes,” as they say. I made my first post here in nearly a year on November 8^th about a pendulum swing for a reason.

The reason being that ONA also has gone thru a pendulum swing. What I’m talking about, and let’s just get down to business: Agencies working thru the Tempel ov Blood have fucked shit up for ONA. The ToB has pulled ONA into a very extremist and radical direction, which eventually harmed its public image and spirit. On top of that, because the general public and junk journalists can’t tell any difference between the ONA the ToB fabricated and the ONA Anton Long fabricated, those journalists since 2018 have been killing the ONA. Which is why it’s now publicly dead: which is why you see the Old Guards take all of their websites and blogs down, and they have vacated.

Nameless Therein, represents the total opposite swing of the pendulum. I want nothing more than for him and all of you guys on the Ferir Team, Beast Xeno et al, than to see you guys go with that dialectical pendulum swing and take ONA into a place that is more intellectual, more philosophical, more spiritual, more Pagan [re: more meaningful and edificatious ((having the quality of Edification))].

But if such a pendulum swing calls for the need of a leader or an Outer Representative: then don’t just take that post/office/title. There is a right and proper way to get that office and title as a descent and honorable human being. Descent people don’t take what does not belong to them. Ask the Old Guards or Anton Long for it, if such is what you desire. Since Anton Long stopped being Grandmaster of ONA, there will always be a power vacuum. I understand that such a vacuum will be filled by somebody. But there is an honorable and right way to fill that vacuum: just ask. Don’t ask me though, I am nobody to give or offer titles and leadership positions in ONA.

I find myself back where I started in 2013. Back then, I resigned as Outer Rep because of the ToB. 2013 was when the ToB began their entryism. At that time, a book author had published a fiction novel which used the ONA as a story prop. In that novel the ONA was some organized crime cult which went around committing murders and so on. The Old Guards bemoaned amongst themselves how ONA was all soft and how it would be great if the real ONA was like the one in fiction.

That bemoaning set the stage for the entryism, where the ToB [I shouldn’t say “ToB”, to be more accurate: ToB was acting under influence of professionals] began talking about how the ONA needs a leader, and one that is hardcore and dangerous; certainly not some outer rep like me who spent time softening ONA with essays on Buddhism and Natural Philosophy.

And so at that time there grew in ONA two opposing factions: 1) one faction wanted ONA to be leaderless & 2) the other faction wanted a hardcore leader in order to make ONA hardcore.

The unfortunate thing about all of us human beings is that we learn to acquire our organic intelligence the hard way: I wanted to tell the Old Guards and general ONA population back then that if you guys follow the example of David Myatt and C18 and become hardcore radicals with radical political views, that you will reap the same exact end results as David Myatt and C18 did in the past.

Any group of people who demonstrates that they will use lethal violence in order to push their radical political beliefs will be perceived as a threat to the State. And so therefore the State will send its agents provocateur into such threats to disrupt your group, cause internal strife and distrust, in order to break that group up and neutralize it. Having a leader makes the job of such agents even more easy because you simply have to decapitate that group of its leader, and the group resultantly falls apart thereafter. It’s this stupid and silly mistake the Far Right has been making for 70 years.

But people don’t listen. They need to learn their lessons the hard way. And so fast forward to today and what happened? Thru the ToB, young kids got radicalized, they couldn’t tell the ToB’s fabricated ONA apart from Anton Long’s, the kids were manipulated to commit violent crimes, they went to jail, agents got promoted, journalists sensationalized this shit: journalists got paid, that nut case from Hate not Hope furthered his political ambitions of gaining further influence, George Soros danced around gleefully: they’re all happy and well off now, and ONA went to shit. They’re just looking for the Next Boogyman to use to further their careers and profits/power: and ONA was a good boogyman. So I left ONA back then in 2013. If they want to take ONA into that direction: fine, but I’m out. And so we all learned our lessons didn’t we? It only took a decade. Which all brings me to why I left ONA in February:

PENDULUM SWING

I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching these past few months. I’ve come to realize something I find very emotionally difficult. Two maxims have been repeating in my mind and echoing inside of me for the past year, since the beginning of 2022.

The first Maxim is something my grandmother and the old people in my culture say: “You will stumble upon that which you hate.”

I’ve come to realized that the ONA has become the very things I hate in life.

I hate democracy, because its premise is faulty. The rhetoric of democracy is that: if we get rid of the power of the King, then the “people” will have power to rule themselves. But is that the case? No, people in a democracy have no more power than serfs and indentured servants did in old Europeans kingdoms. In a democracy, cabals and organized groups of rich and powerful men control the government and country [Deep State as Trump and company calls it] and wield strong influence.

ONA has been democratized: we have gotten rid of Anton Long, gotten rid of his post as Grandmaster, stopped him from writing primary source ONA MSS. Just like England did with its monarch. And just like in any democracy: organized groups end up playing entryism and gaining control and influence: ToB did it to ONA. It’s the same pattern that took place in the USSR: an organized group of people used communism to gain influence on their Russian audience/market, took control of the country, gain their profit and career promotions… and ran Russia to shit with the collapse of the Soviet Union.

I hate Liberalism. And ONA has become very liberal. Just like how America is liberal. For example, there was a time in the long past when WASP [White Anglo-Saxon Protestant] had a meaning. Today, because of Liberalism, America has destroyed its Traditional Religion of Catholicism and Protestant Christianity, and so, there is no more “P” in WASP. America is so Liberal today, that any inkling of ethnic or racial consciousness is deemed to be racists. Ask a group of young White people in America who were all born and raised in this Liberal society of ours what their ethnicity is, and I can guarantee that most of those young kids won’t even know [lack awareness/consciousness of the fact] that they are Anglo-Saxon. And so there is no more “AS” in WASP.

That same Liberal pattern is inside ONA. Because all of us, as with all things in nature, are a product of our environment, and we all are born and raised our entire human lives inside of a Liberal society [since the 70s]. ONA has gotten rid of its Traditional religion: Traditional Satanism. You can be any type of Satanist or even any type of religion you want in ONA these days… even a Buddhist [me].

And like how America did away with its own Culture: ONA has Liberally done away with its culture. To the extent where the Old Guards, in creating the Hebdomadry Way [or whatever it’s called] said in simple English: We went thru the entire ONA corpus and we have deemed 99% of the whole thing to be useless. Cultural praxes in ONA meaning stuff like the ceremonies in the Black Book of Satan, and so on.

And just like how America puts the “American Dream” as a carrot on a stick, where it tells Americans: all that old religion, culture, and shit don’t matter because what you want and are seeking is that nebulous American Dream: ONA and the Hebdomadry Way puts the concept of “Lapis Philosophicus” [a very nebulous abstraction] as the carrot on a stick were they say: all that Satanism stuff, the ceremonies, the magic and shit, that all’s dumb and useless, all you want and need to chase after is that carrot on a stick!

All the Liberalism that the ONA has become, even going so far as to parrot Liberal society in saying that in ONA there exists “gender equality,” going so far with Reichfolk in saying that all racial diversity is Numinous and divine, and having detoothed Anton Long [making his primary source ONA MSS only “guidelines” and not binding], has led me to the second Maxim that now echoes in my mind.

Dan Dread said/coined this second Maxim. He once said: “If Satanism can meaning anything, it means nothing.”

Today, because ONA has done away with all of its old institutions – grandmaster, traditional religion, traditional culture, binding concepts, values, etc – it can mean and be anything to anyone. ONA has no established political standard. ONA has no established ethical standard. ONA has no value system. Anybody can be ONA, and as an ONA associate you can pick and chose different ONA ideas to be ONA in your own way. Some ONA people are communists, some are capitalists, some are Leftists, some are Rightist, etc. ONA today can be anything you want it to be. And so, because it can mean and be anything: it is nothing.

And that is a very big problem, as I have come to see: the problem is that because ONA is today very liberal and without established rules: people can come in, identify as ONA, or as a Nexion, and say shit like: we stand for rape… we stand for torture and rape of children.

But the problem with people being born and raised in a Liberal environment is that we do not like established rules and ethics. Because the moment Anton Long or the Old Guards say something like: “Okay… this has gone too far, we need rules and ethics” we’d all whine and cry shit like: “That’s dogma! We have a right to live our lives like we want!” ONA has no established system of value. It values nothing. It means nothing. It can be anything.

I now know that the older I grow up, the more conservative I become. I do have my one value system: I value Traditional Religion, which is why I continue to be a Theravada Buddhist, because it’s the religion of my people and race. I value Thai, Khmer, and Chinese cultures, because those are the cultures I was born and raised in and are the cultures of my own race and people. I value Ethos and Ethics based on the concept of Honor and Decency. And because of such concept of Honor and Decency, there are things, behaviours, actions, ways of speaking, ways of carrying yourself in society, ways of interacting with your elders and superiors that are “right” and “wrong.”

Many times in the past, often in Nexion Zine, I will play the devils advocate, and rhetorically write things and say things in order to see how ONA people and the Old Guards will react. For example, if I use rhetoric to make it seem like rape is fine [militaries used it in the past, etc], would they put their foot down and actually show an inkling or desire for ethical boundaries? Would they stop being Liberal and give Anton Long his teeth again where they say that such conduct and actions go against what ONA represents and values [indicating a System of Values] because it says so in such and such primary source text by Anton Long? How far must things be taken before ONA realizes that lines need to be drawn, that Ethos and Ethics need to be revisited and addressed, that boundaries need to be set, that ONA needs to represent something, that it needs solid ground to stand on: in order to be meaningful and edificatious?

I am at a point where that unless ONA changes, if it stays the way that it currently has become: then I cannot endorse it, support it, or associate with it, because it represents everything I dislike about our current Western Liberal societies, and because it [ONA] is so nebulous today that it is meaningless. Unfortunately, the people who can change it: the Old Guards and Anton Long, are no longer here, and may not even still understand that something is fundamentally wrong and broken with ONA today. By their fruit ye shall judge: it only takes a good look at the fruit/people that ONA has been producing for the past several years, to understand that something is broken. Newton was right after all: certain changes we made in the past to circumvent the Blackwood Problem created unintended negative causal reactions.

These are my last moments in ONA. Even though ONA doesn’t represent me anymore, I still have a sentimental attachment to the spirit/egregore/volksgeist of ONA which brings me back to check up on it. I hate to see it die because it is broken. In the old days, it would have been easy to work to fix the problems because Anton Long was around and you could just talk with the Old Guards about issues and they would relay such talks to Anton Long who would fix things for us. They are all gone; if they are around, they seem indifferent.

My sentimental attachments to the spirit of ONA just gives me an instinctive reaction when people seem to claim leadership or claim to be outer rep… but at this moment in time, I must admit that, I secretly believe that such might be a workable idea. But, like I said: there is a proper and decent way to get that title and post. I’ll hang around for a couple months, to see if the Old Guards will come back to help fix the problems. If they don’t come back, it means they wish for ONA to indeed publicly die away. And I will follow their cue and sever my sentimental attachments permanently. I’ve learned a lot from ONA, and I gained a very valuable Life Skill from it: writing. All that being said: the pendulum swing ONA is going into, is a good swing. I hope it will be fruitful.

Notes On Outer Representative

.:.I will tell you guys the story of how I once became so-called “Outer Representative” of the ONA, and about what happened to that office/post/title.

Seems as though every time I leave ONA, ONA slowly gets sick, becomes disarrayed, people leave, things get chaotic/disorganized/incoherent, and what few people are left in ONA start claiming titles and setting themselves up as the “New Leader.” I’ve left ONA now 3 times. ONA is now publicly dead… again.

Originally, way back in 2006, when I first learned about the ONA, I wanted to be a member of it very badly. Unfortunately at that time, ONA was publicly dead. There were only 2 significant ONA people around back then [circa 2005-2006]: 1) the Old Guard “DarkLogos,” & 2) Kris [Ryan Anschauung] of the Temple of THEM.

You can’t be a member of something which is dead and defunct. And so, my only option I knew of, was to help revive it, so it can come back to life, that way I can be a member of it. Me [and my WSA friends] ended up joining forces with DarkLogos and Kris/Ryan, and so the three of us, along with another Associate nymmed “Saturnyan352” worked together behind the scenes to resurrect the ONA from the dead.

During that era of ONA’s “dark ages” [circa 2005], ONA had died due in many parts to the Outer Representative Michael Ford leaving ONA to start his own thing. As with dead things, you have vultures encircling the carcass. And so, during those dark ages, a vulture named Grand Magister Blackwood [Tom Raspotnik] ran around the internet claiming that somebody in New York had made him the Grand Master of ONA. Me and DarkLogos spent a lot of time having fun with Blackwood, getting rid of him. Those were fun times. Blackwood’s claims were fraudulent, because there are only a number of legit ways that he could have been made the leader of ONA: 1) Michael Ford gave him the leadership, 2) Anton Long gave him the leadership, or 3) One of the Old Guards gave him the leadership. None of those three were the case.

By the year 2008-2009, I had my own WordPress blog. At my blog, I began to write “ONA” stuff. Except, most of what I spent my time writing about was Buddhism. Why? Well because I honestly had not fucking clew/clue what exactly the ONA was besides that it was a cool denomination of Satanism. And so, not knowing what ONA exactly was, I was not able to write anything actually ONA. And so, I wrote about Theravada Buddhism.

Around the year 2010ish, the Old Guard SinisterMoon [my liaison to Anton Long] told me that she and the other Old Guards were leaving the internet. SinisterMoon says to me: “You have everything under control. You don’t need us anymore. You can be outer rep if you want.”

At that time, I had no idea what outer rep was, because I simply had not yet read most of the ONA MSS to see that post or title used by anybody. I accepted the nonchalant offer anyways.

But I told SinisterMoon, that I can’t just tell people in my blogs and on the internet that I am the new outer rep, because it would look fake and people would accuse me of making false claims. I told SinisterMoon that I need the Old Guards to somehow make it known that I am the outer rep, in order to authenticate things. SinisterMoon and the Old Guards disappeared for a while and returned with two of their own ways to help me. Their first way was to delete the contents of nineangles.info, which at that time was the only ONA site run by the Old Guards, and in place of the old ONA content they had placed a link to my blog, and had redirected traffic from ninangles.info to my blog:

source: https://web.archive.org/web/20120128193049/http://www.nineangles.info:80/

The second way the Old Guards helped me out was to get David Myatt’s own historiographer Julie Wright to actually say a few things in a biography of David Myatt she had written on her now defunct site. I had downloaded that essay and uploaded it to archive dot org for record keeping. The essay, called “A Short Biography of David Myatt,” says this on page 16:

source: https://archive.org/details/AShortBiographyOfDavidMyatt/page/n15/mode/1up?view=theater

At this same time, Dr. Monette was interviewing a few of us in ONA as he was writing a university text book which had a chapter in it about ONA. I asked Dr. Monette for help also. I told him my predicament, that I was offered the post/title of outer rep, but that I can’t myself make any such claims to such titles. I need people of name and reputation to inform people. Dr. Monette helped by writing a whole section about me as outer rep in his ONA chapter [which never made it into the actual published book], which can be found here: https://archive.org/details/ONA-ChapterFive

And so, I have never made any claims that I was the “leader” or outer representative of ONA. The objective fact was that: 1) An Old Guard nymmed SinisterMoon offered me said post/title, which I accepted, 2) David Myatt’s historiographer made the claim in her biography of David Myatt that I [the young Asian woman of Khmer heritage in question] led the ONA, & 3) A reputable professor of a university reiterated such.

I accepted the offer. Note my words. I use my wording very carefully. Nobody ever officially made me outer rep. Anton Long never chose me to be outer rep. It was simply offered to me by an Old Guard in a very nonassertive and nonchalant way. As if she said to me: “So yeah… since we’re leaving and all… I guess you can be outer rep… but only if you want! You don’t have to be outer rep, but if you want you can.” If anybody – regarding my former post/title offered to me – was making claims, or even false claims, they would be: The Old Guards, David Myatt’s biographer Julie Wright, and Dr. Monette.

Eventually, before I left ONA back then [I wrote about this leaving in Nexion Zine 1.0], I wrote my Resignation Paper and turned it into the Old Guards. When you are a subordinate of a superior in a proper and professional setting, and you desire to quit or leave your job or post, it’s protocol to turn in a resignation paper which must be accepted [your resignation must be accepted by your superior]. In my resignation paper I specifically vacated the post of outer rep and I specifically RETURNED that post and title back to the Old Guard who offered it to me: SinisterMoon.

And so, like a football or a Trophy, when I returned that ball [the title of outer rep] back to SinisterMoon, that ball was in her possession and in possession of the Old Guards. Unless those same Old Guards gave or offered that ball/title to you, or unless Anton Long gave or offered that ball/title to you back then: you are making fraudulent claims of an office or title that does not legit belong to you.

So I left ONA, and a year later I returned to the online world and checked up on ONA, to see how it was doing. It was sick, once again dying, all of the people I once knew in ONA were gone, all of my allies like Beast Xeno, Dan Dread, etc were gone. And there were vultures circling ONA’s sickly body.

Upon my return that era [2013-2014], I reestablished contact with the Old Guard DarkLogos to inform him that I have returned to ONA. I wanted to help nurse ONA back to health. And so, my first conversation with DarkLogos was roughly: “Have you read Dr. Monette’s book yet? He’s published it.” DarkLogos says to me: “I’ve ordered it, but it hasn’t come yet. What do you think of it?” I said back to DarkLogos: “Dr. Monette, in his chapter on ONA, claims that some person named Jall is outer rep? Who is this Jall? I don’t know this person. Did you guys make Jall outer rep? Cuz if you did, then I’m cool with it and will support your choice. But if you didn’t make Jall outer rep, then we have a problem.”

The problem is the “Blackwood Problem:” people playing power games, usurping titles, and trying to make themselves leader of ONA. The Old Guards and I worked things out with Anton Long to have him retire and stop writing and to get rid of the old office of “grandmaster” of ONA because of this problem. DarkLogos stated that neither he nor the other Old Guards made this Jall person outer rep. DarkLogos said that he’d have a word with Dr. Monette about the said claim. I complained, saying to DarkLogos: “That post and title needs to go. They keep finding ways to play their power whore games. If the office of outer rep remains in ONA, ONA will always be mired in power struggles like the old days.” DarkLogos agreed, and disappeared for a few days. Days later Anton Long and the Old Guards everywhere online removed/dissolved the post and title of Outer representative saying that such post/title was a jape or test. It was a real office and title: David Myatt also created Reichsfolk National-Socialism, and Reichsfolk does have a post/office/title of “Outer Representative.” Richard Stirling [who has written quite a few ONA stuff] is the Outer Representative of Reichsfolk. Same David Myatt: same pattern of implementing an office/title of “Outer Representative.”

I’m slightly different from most ONA people: I’m not a product of ONA Mythos. I’m not going to tell stories about how such offices were clever japes and tests. I am an honest person and I keep shit real: There once did exist an office of Grandmaster and an office of Outer Representative, but since ONA has evolved to be an open source Subculture and a decentralized leaderless movement, those two offices and titles have been dissolved by Anton Long since the 2011-2014 era of ONA and are defunct. Anybody who has been in ONA for over a decade knows this. Which beings us to the real issue:

SUBCULTURE

A subculture is a little small culture. For example, the Punk scene [people who listen to punk music]. If you are a punker, a punk rocker, you belong to that punk music subculture, and you dress a certain way, listen to a certain style of music, speak with punk subcultural jargon, but: there is no such thing as a leader or representative of punk rock subculture.

Likewise with the surfing and skateboarding and hip hop subculture: there simply is no such thing as a leader, grandmaster, potentate, inner circle, outer representative of any of those subcultures.

But in cultures and subculture there are 1) Adepts & 2) Influencers. Adepts are like computer jocks who can program computers and build their own computer from scratch. Influencers – such as influencers from TikTok and social media may not be adepts at shit regarding their subculture [as an American, I doubt the TikTok Influencer Bella Poarch is an adept American where she can recite the US constitution from memory, name all the capitals of all 50 states, name you all the grandchildren that George Washington had, and shit] but due to their looks, or social skills, or charisma, or whatever: they wield a large influence upon their peers.

As a subculture and leaderless movement, it simple makes no logical sense for ONA to have leaders and inner or outer representatives. But yes: ONA subculture has its Adepts and Influencers.

And that is the bedrock or fundamental issue of the Blackwood Problem: people in ONA who claim to be leader of ONA or claim to be Outer Representative of ONA are fundamentally wanting Influence.

MARKETING

If it is influence that you are seeking, then making yourself the leader or outer rep is not good marketing. Why so? Well, it’s as if you came to ONA and you said to ONA people: “I understand that you are a self-described leaderless movement and subculture, and that’s all great, but I will be your leader anyways because I have all of these great ideas that I want you guys to adopt… and on top of that, not only do I want to be your leader and make you adopt my ideas, but there are a few things I don’t like about ONA and boy do I have wonderful ideas to make ONA better for you guys!”

In a market/audience which feels and understands itself to be leaderless and a subculture: how do you sell yourself and ideas to such people by going against the grain of their subculture and claiming leadership titles?

I watched a whole lot of Hitler and Third Reich documentaries. There was a time when Hitler was asked what Charisma was. Charisma is the fundamental factor/ingredient [there are a few other factors] of influence in any culture, subculture, religion, cult, organization, political party, and social setting. Hitler answers: “Charisma is a special relationship between me and the German folk.” What Hitler was saying is that Charisma is the bond and relationship between you and your audience/market. It’s one of the reasons why Hitler publicly tried hard to appear as if he was single and not in a relationship with a woman. The relationship is Hitler + German people. The same public presentation and technique can be seen in popular Influencers like Bella Poarch and Amouranth, who both kept their marriages a total secret from their audience/market, until their recent respective divorces.

Which means that if you do not know your audience/market: you will fail in selling yourself and your ideas [fail at inspiring and influencing] to that audience/market. Which defeats your premise in the first place doesn’t it? You want influence on or in ONA, but you don’t know your audience/market. The ONA market/audience is a leaderless subculture: people who don’t need a special and sanctioned person to tell them how to be a Satanist, a Pagan, or an Occultist. But yet you insist on being a leader or an Outer representative.

I have been around online Satanism since 2003 on MySpace, and I’ve been around ONA since 2006: I have seen Satanists, many of whom were very intelligent, come to Satanism or ONA claiming titles – reverend, grotto master, high priest, blah blah blah – and 100% of the time those same people huff and puff for a good year or two and fall off the face of the earth failing to have any influence on Satanism or ONA because they didn’t know or have an audience. 100% of the time.

And so, in closing: I can’t police ONA subculture and I can’t make people stop claiming to be leader or outer representative of ONA. People – other human beings – are free agents with free will and most often, with egos [hence the grand claims] – but I can try to reason with some of you who are in ONA who are intelligent and who seek influence: if it is influence that you seek in ONA, claiming titles is counter productive and will cause you to fail in time, 100% guaranteed.

What I can also do is to give ONA people a second perspective, point of view, from those that make such claims of title and leadership: ONA is 1) Leaderless, it is a subculture, you don’t need nobody to read a few ONA MSS and be a Satanist or Pagan or ONA Associate, 2) ONA has always, from its birth, been an individual process of just you yourself going thru the Seven-Fold Way on your own time and terms; and so as an individual process, having a leader or outer representative is stupid and irrelevant, 3) The only real and genuine Leader of ONA is Anton Long simply because Anton Long created/codified the Order of Nine Angles, it belongs to him, it is his; & 4) ONA or the Order of Nine Angles is a name of the ONA Corpus, which is circa 5000 pages of stuff written by the only genuine Leader of ONA [who gave up his title and office of leadership in 2011]; and so, as such, 5000 pages of writing has no leader or outer representative. People will always make claims, you as ONA people just need to have the simple understanding of what a subculture is and the understanding of what ONA is [how it was put together by Anton Long].

I find it very disappointing that ONA people can say, act, and pretend that they look up to Anton Long / David Myatt, that they respect him, that they study his writings and even see such writings as scripture but: the same ONA people don’t seem to have the honor and capacity to simply emulate Anton Long. Anton Long gave up his leadership role and titles way back in 2011, and never since then, has he ever made any claims to be its leader or representative. In fact, even before 2011, in the Letters of Steven Brown, Anton Long has made it known that even he is not the leader of ONA. But yet – but yet – there are ONA folks who have and still do insist that they are leaders or titled/entitled representatives of ONA. It’s like those Christians who bible thump and quote scripture… but who lack the spiritual capacity to emulate Jesus and be Christ Like. Actions speak louder than words, as they say. By their fruit… this outer representative thing is a test like the Old Guards said isn’t it? A test of actual character and ulterior motive.

Omega 9 Alpha: Beyond The Dialectic